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Waiting for someone who will never come back is the most fatigue thing. No matter how hard you try to win him back, everything is just to be so.. futile. Frequently, even when I know we're clearly not suitable for each other, I still want to try it out anyway, and see if we can literally find a small balance where we can rest at. I don't wanna forget the past, I'll just keep it as one of my lifetime stories. That quite past will become sustenance. I know I must stop looking back, cause if I do.. I'll never improve. So what does, "You're not up to my standard." means ? Modernise your mind, will you ? From time to time, I don't see the bad qualities in you, I just want you to know you've cultivate me ever since we took our first step together. Even if I can't be the man I love in this life, everything we had between each other will become my inspiration in my art work. Take it as when you're stacking building blocks. If you want to stack them higher , you have to build a steady base.